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Dad's obviously not ambidextrous
September 30, 2010 - Per Peterson
My dad used to let me write columns in the paper when I was at an age when I was considered cute enough to pull it off. When someone asked him why Olivia’s columns weren’t in the paper anymore, I heard him say she was getting too old and it wasn’t as cute as when she was younger. Whatever. No biggie. They never paid me anyway. With the paper, he has control with his columns, on the Internet, however, I can get into the place where he blogs and post my own. He he. So that’s what I’m doing, and will keep doing from time to time when the mood strikes. I’m not buying the cute thing anyway, I think he got jealous because people liked my columns more than his. Nothing against my dad, but he just hasn’t been able to grasp this whole column thing like I have. So this is my first ever blog and I’m gonna take this opportunity to write about something hilarious that happened Wednesday evening. We were riding back from the mailbox on our bikes and my dad had a bunch of mail (a week's worth) curled up in his right arm. He was steering with his left hand (dude, you’re right-handed, talk about asking for it). Anyway, he was trying to keep the mail from falling out of his arm when he swerved and lost control of his bike. He fell, but it wasn’t just any fall, it was stuntman-like, a $10,000 winner for sure on funniest home videos. He actually flew over the handlebars and tumbled into the ditch. OK, it wasn’t funny at first. It was really the first time I had seen him get really hurt. I helped pick up the mail and must’ve asked him if he was alright like five times. Mr. Tough Guy said, ‘yeah I’m fine,” everytime. ‘I’m OK.’ No, dad, people who are fine don’t stay on the ground that long. People who are OK don’t bleed from both hands and say “ow, ow, ow.” Quite an actor, this guy. Well, he got back up on that bike and rode quietly home, in pain, probly embarrassed, too. He said both his hands hurt, his belly hurt, his chest, his left arm … oh, and he has this huge bruise on his left knee, too. Gross. I know he learned a lesson - he steered with his right hand on the way home after the crash. I’m sorry you got hurt, dad, and when I say it’s hilarious I meant it’s one of those things you can look back at and laugh. Let me know when that is.
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