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Hey Aquaman, lose the suit!

July 29, 2009 - Per Peterson
In donning a special polyurethane suit called an Arena X-Glide, German swimmer Paul Biedermann admitted he had an edge over his opponents in Tuesday’s 200-meter freestyle race in which he defeated our favorite pot-smoking U.S. swimmer, Michael Phelps. He admitted it! What more do swimming officials need to ban the wearing of special suits in competitive swimming? Not only can swimmers not hide the fact they are cheating, now they’re admitting it IS cheating! But I suppose it’s not actually cheating until the sport officially bans these super swim suits that turn mere mortals into human Aquamen. Using steroids is cheating in baseball and football because drugs and other substances are banned. And it’s a no-brainer, just like wearing one of these suits should be in swimming. I applaud Biedermann for admitting the suits make a difference. I challenge him to lose the suit and beat Phelps in a more natural way. “I hope there will be a time when I can beat Michael Phelps without these suits,” he said in an interview after his big win. OK? Well lose the suit then, Biedermann and take Phelps on. Then, if you beat him you can really boast about your accomplishment. Until then, your win Tuesday comes with a water-logged asterisk.

 
 

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