So, there are now 7 billion people on this planet, huh? Sounds like a lot. Sounds like too many, actually.
And apparently, we ain't seen nothin' yet.
After adding 1 billion people in the last 13 years, demographers say planet Earth's population is expected to grow to 8 billion by 2025 and to 10 billion by 2083. In 1804, the population reached 1 billion, and it took a whole century more to hit 2 billion. Since then, we've really picked up the pace: We hit 3 billion in 1959, 4 billion less than 20 years later, 5 billion in 1987 and 6 billion during the next 11 years.
Long story short: We're growing too fast.
Since this tremendous growth can have negative effects - like overcrowding and a more hasty exhaustion of our natural resources, not to mention how it will affect efforts to curb world hunger - maybe there's something we could do to slow things down a bit.
Don't look at me, I'm not a scientist, but I think this would be a good time for our world leaders and scientists to step up their efforts to start a civilization on Mars. We've been teased in recent years about how we'll someday inhabit that planet, so it's not like people aren't already thinking about it. The big question is, who would we send there?
I have some ideas. I put together a list of people I think would make great Martians - people that if they were gone wouldn't be all that missed:
Anyone with the last name Kardashian. The Kardashians would make perfect Martians. As the charter family of Mars, they could rule the planet - they already think they run this one. This would be a win-win, because, let's be honest, would they really be missed? Bruce Jenner can stay - he is, after all, an Olympic hero - but we must make sure Kim Kardashian gets on that space plane. Kim has apologized to her fans for her failed marriage to Minnesota native and NBA basketball player Kris Humphries and said this past week that she really wants a family and babies. Yyyah. I guess we should take her word for it, even though she's got a funny way of showing it. Kim, if you desire so badly to reproduce, have at it - just do it on Mars; we don't need any more little Kardashians running around our crowded planet.
Mars would need some other TV personalities, too, diverse ones who can multitask, so whip out your passport Nancy Grace, Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Phil. Pack your bags Piers Morgan, Ryan Seacrest and Jay Leno. Your services on Earth are no longer required.
And with the birth of any new civilization, politics would be a must; there must be order, right? We won't get into what sitting politicians should be sent away - you can make your own list on that one - but Mars certainly would need pundits to spread their wealth of political knowledge to the nation, people like Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly and Sarah Palin come to mind, although Palin, even though she's turned her attention more toward TV talk than hard-core politics, just might have enough credibility on Mars to become its ruler. Not that she would need a vice president, but Michele Bachmann could probably handle the job.
Of course, sports would be part of the culture on Mars, so bon voyage LeBron James, and take as many fellow NBA players as you'd like to start your new league. They're not doing anything anyway. Oh, but leave Humphries, I doubt he would want to continue to share the same planet with any Kardashian.