I was reminded of an age-old, but also important, adage at the poker table recently: You can’t judge a book by its cover.

And that’s a vital reminder about human relationships. Yes, even for us pastors!

If you would allow me to digress for just a moment: The thing most people who don’t play tournament poker don’t understand is that it can consist of hours upon hours of sheer boredom while you fold bad hand after bad hand, punctuated by seconds of scintillating excitement when you finally are dealt something of value that you can play.

So, the key is: You gotta do something with your time in between those rare opportunities, and a lot of poker players like to talk.

If you’re thinking that a pastor from a fairly progressive Protestant denomination may seem like the proverbial “gray duck” amongst a bunch of other multi-colored ducks sitting around a poker table, then you’d be correct.

Hence, that’s why I mostly just listen to others banter about the state of the world and politics and sports, three oft-covered topics among poker players. Best just to stay silent than rehash ongoing cultural differences we’re never going to solve surrounding a felt table.

But at a table during a recent tournament, one pokermate stunned me, and made me again check my own biases, of which I know I have many.

This parable begins when the table I was sitting at broke into a discussion about gun laws and gun rights, and the bloke who eventually would turn my thinking on its head, expressed his support for the latter.

Full admission: Gun talk is a hot button item for me, and I can quickly paint someone into a corner depending on their gun views.

So imagine my surprise, when just a half hour later this same gent issued strong support for America’s social safety net, including programs that care for our seniors, those in poverty, those who are disabled, those who are on the margins.

“All of that isn’t where the waste is anyway,” he emphatically stated to those around the table. “If you need a hand up, you need a hand up.”

Words, which you can imagine, made a pastor’s heart sing! … And just as my heart leapt … so did my shame!

Matthew 7:4-5 immediately came to mind, as I admonished myself: “Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.”

So there you go! … Another reminder that we humans are a quixotic lot, and we’d do well to start listening to each other rather than judging the books by the covers. Amen.

Devlyn Brooks is the CEO of Churches United in Moorhead, Minn., and an ordained pastor in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America serving Faith Lutheran Church in Wolverton, Minn. He blogs about faith at findingfaithin.com, and can be reached at devlynbrooks@gmail.com.